| Written by Gil Silva | |
| Friday, 01 January 2010 | |
 Johanes Modobe, Soldadu 744, ist. Tuir Ministru Negocio Estranjeiru Timor Leste, Zacarias Albano da Costa iha loron 28 Dezembru 2009 iha Palacio Governu, Dili katak Susilo Bambang fo ona ordem atu revista informasaun husi komandante militar sira ne’ebe halo mandatu iha Tinan 1978 durante rezime Soeharto. Nicolao Lobato, nu’udar matenek Timor oan nian ida husi Bazartete, Distritu Liquica ne’ebe foin halo tinan 23 deit nomeia kedan ba kargu Primeiru Ministru Dahuluk Timor Leste nian husi Comite Central Fretilin (CCF) iha Novembru 1975 no ikus mai Mate ho Tinan 26 iha mota ida iha foho Maudelu, Maubisse nian.  Archivu konaba Nicolao Lobato, CHART Nune’e mos tuir publikasaun husi Jornal MERDEKA, edisaun loron 3 Janeiru 1979 ne’ebe CJITL hetan asesu mos hatudu katak Nicolao Lobato hetan oho husi soldadu militar ida ho naran Johanes Modobe (Sersan Dua) husi elementu Peleton I Bataylon 744 Udayana ne’ebe konsege tiru Lobato iha nia Ain, Kelen no Kabun ho kilat marka "AR".  Jenderal Yusuf Hare Fatin Embuscada Tuir publikasaun ne'e katak, Foho Maudelu, Maubisse hetan tiha ona embuskada husi bataylon 744 durante loron 11 antes Nicolao Lobato hetan tiru iha operasaun ne’e. Nune’e mos tuir archivu husi Unidade Aero Forca Indonezia ou TNI Angkatan Udara ne’ebe CJITL hetan asesu husi riset data, hatudu katak OPERASI PARIKESIT I nu’udar operasaun konjunta ida ne’ebe hahu iha loron 2 Dezembru 1978 no remata iha loron 27 Marcu 1979 ho misaun eksklusivu atu oho Nicolao Lobato, Antonio Carvarinho no seluk tan iha parte foho Matebian no Parte Oeste nian (inklui Maubisse). Iha arkivu konfidensial ne’e hateten, OPERASI PARIKESIT I ne’e involve mos forca marineiru no KOPASGAT (Komandu Pasukan Gerak Cepat) ou Unidade Forca Intervensaun Lalais.  Komandantes TNI hare Isin Mate Estado Timor Leste rasik rekonhece tiha ona Nicolao Lobato hanesan heroi nasional ida ba libertasaun liu husi rekonhecementu oin – oin hanesan Aeroportu Internasional Timor Leste nian ne’ebe Uja Nicolao Lobato nia naran no mos Palacio Prezidente Aitarak laran ne’ebe mos uja heroi ne’e nia naran. Husi dokumentu ne’ebe CJITL hetan sidauk konsege identifika hakoi fatin husi Nicolao Lobato ho soldadu 22 sira seluk, maske nune’e esforsu riset data kontinua hala’o husi ekipa reporter CJITL. Arkivu sira ne’ebe CJITL hetan tutan husi riset data online ne’e sei uja deit ba interese publikasaun noticia. (Gil da Silva) CJITL nu’udar Centru Jornalista Investigativu Timor Leste ne’ebe servicu ba prinsipiu balancu no transparante bazeia ba faktus no lialos. Kontaktu ami iha 7250761 ou editor@cjitl.org ba kritita no sugestaun. Fonte:http://cjitl.org/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=837&Itemid=1 |
- Explora Hau NIa Hanoin Ho LIVRE...:)
Johanes Modobe Husi Bataylon 744 Mak Tiru Mate Nicolao Lobato
Things aren't always what they seem
Two traveling angels stopped to spend the night in the home of a wealthy family.
The family was rude and refused to let the angels stay in the mansion's guest room.
Instead the angels were given a small space in the cold basement.
As they made their bed on the hard floor, the older angel saw a hole in the wall and repaired it.
When the younger angel asked why, the older angel replied,
"Things aren't always what they seem"
The next night the pair came to rest at the house of a very poor, but very hospitable farmer and his wife.
After sharing what little food they had the couple let the angels sleep in their bed where they could have a good night's rest.
When the sun came up the next morning the angels found the farmer and his wife in tears.
Their only cow, whose milk had been their sole income, lay dead in the field.
The younger angel was infuriated and asked the older angel how could you have let this happen?
The first man had everything, yet you helped him, she accused.
The second family had little but was willing to share everything, and you let the cow die..
"Things aren't always what they seem," the older angel replied.
"When we stayed in the basement of the mansion, I noticed there was gold stored in that hole in the wall.
Since the owner was so obsessed with greed and unwilling to share his good fortune, I sealed the wall so he wouldn't find it."
"Then last night as we slept in the farmers bed, the angel of death came for his wife I gave him the cow instead.
Things aren't always what they seem."
Sometimes that is exactly what happens when things don't turn out the way they should. If you have faith, you just need to trust that every out come is always to your advantage. You just might not know it until some time later...
Oooo
Some people ( )
come into our lives ) /
and quickly go.. (_ /
oooO
( ) Some people
\ ( become friends
\_ ) and stay awhile...
leaving beautiful Oooo
footprints on our ( )
hearts... ) /
( _/
oooO
( ) and we are
\ ( never
\_ ) quite the same
because we have
made a good
friend!!
Yesterday is history.
Tomorrow a mystery.
Today is a gift.
That's why it's called the present!
I think this is special...live and savor every
moment... This is not a dress rehearsal!
(\ /)
( \ __ / )
( \()/ )
( / \ ) TAKE THIS LITTLE ANGEL
( / \/ \ ) AND KEEP HER CLOSE TO YOU
/ \ SHE IS YOUR GUARDIAN ANGEL
( ) SENT TO WATCH OVER YOU
____
THIS IS A SPECIAL GUARDIAN ANGEL... YOU MUST PASS THIS ON TO 5 PEOPLE WITHIN THE HOUR OF RECEIVING HER,
IF YOU HAVE PASSED HER ON, SHE WILL WATCH OVER YOU FOREVER....
IF NOT, HER TEARS WILL FLOW
Now don't delete this message, because it comes from a very special angel.
Right Now -
-somebody is thinking of you.
-somebody is caring about you.
-somebody misses you
-somebody wants to talk to you.
-somebody wants to be with you.
-somebody hopes you aren't in trouble.
-somebody is thankful for the support you have provided.
-somebody wants to hold your hand.
-somebody hopes everything turns out all right.
-somebody wants you to be happy.
-somebody wants you to find him/her.
-somebody is celebrating your successes.
-somebody wants to give you a gift.
-somebody thinks that you ARE a gift.
-somebody loves you.
-somebody admires your strength.
-somebody is thinking of you and smiling.
-somebody wants to be your shoulder to cry on.
SOMEBODY NEEDS YOU TO SEND THIS TO THEM
Never take away anyone's hope. That may be all they have.
Inspirasaun Moris Nian
por Sri sri Ravi Shankar
Fundador da ONG Arte de Viver
"Todos os indivíduos são agraciados com todas as virtudes do mundo. Elas simplesmente estão cobertas por falta de compreensão e estresse. Tudo que é preciso é revelar as virtudes que já estão lá.
Técnicas de respiração e meditação são muito eficientes para acalmar a mente.
Aprender algo sobre nossa respiração é muito importante. Nossa respiração tem uma grande lição para nos ensinar, que nós havíamos esquecido. Para todo ritmo na mente, há um ritmo correspondente na respiração e para todo ritmo na respiração há uma emoção correspondente. Então, quando você não puder lidar com sua mente diretamente, através da respiração você pode lidar melhor com ela ".
Fonte: http://expiracaoeinspiracao.blogspot.com/2009/08/viver-e-respirar.html
Obrigado todos...
Viva Timor Leste, a nossa patria....!!!
Life Inspiration ;-)
Now it is time for us to focus on what happens next.
The more we delve into how we got where we are,
the more we stay where we were.
The more we analyze what is not working,
the more things do not work.
And the more we consider how we would like it to be,
the more things become as we would have them.
The choice is ours.
Allen Cohen
Love the earth and sun and animals,
Despise riches, give alms to everyone that asks,
Stand up for the stupid and crazy,
Devote your income and labor to others...
And your very flesh shall be a great poem.
Walt Whitman American Poet
Here is a test to find out whether your mission in life is complete.
If you're alive, it isn't.
Richard Bach Jonathan Livingston Seagull
"There is no such thing in anyone's life as an unimportant day."
Alexander Woollcott American Author
"And forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet
and the winds long to play with your hair."
Kahlil Gibran Lebanese Poet and Novelist
"People travel to wonder at the height of the mountains,
at the huge waves of the seas,
at the long course of the rivers,
at the vast compass of the ocean,
at the circular motion of the stars,
and yet they pass by themselves without wondering."
St. Augustine, Early Christian Priest, Author
"I would rather be ashes than dust!
I would rather that my spark should burn out in a brilliant blaze
than it should be stifled by dry rot.
I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow,
than a sleepy and permanent planet.
The proper function of man is to live, not to exist.
I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them.
I shall use my time."
Jack London American Author Meditate.
Live purely.
Be quiet. Do your work with mastery.
Like the moon, come out from behind the clouds! Shine
Buddha The Enlightened One
I will not die an unlived life.
I will not live in fear of falling or catching fire.
I choose to inhabit my days, to allow my living to open me,
to make me less afraid, more accessible,
to loosen my heart until it becomes a wing, a torch, a promise.
I choose to risk my significance;
to live so that which comes to me as seed goes to the next as blossom
and that which comes to me as blossom, goes on as fruit.
Dawna Markova Author of Open Mind.
When you were born, you cried and the world rejoiced.
Live your life so that when you die, the world cries and you rejoice.
Cherokee Expression
Every blade of grass has its angel that bends over it and whispers, 'Grow, grow.'
The Talmud
"The day will come when, after harnessing space,
the winds, the tides and gravitation,
we shall harness for God the energies of love.
And on that day, for the second time in the history of the world,
we shall have discovered fire."
Pierre Teilhard de Chardin French Paleontologist and Philosopher
"You must be the change you wish to see in the world."
Mahatma Gandhi Indian Political and Spiritual Leader
"Be glad of life, because it gives you the chance to love and to work
and to play and to look up at the stars."
Henry Van Dyke American Educator
To live content with small means;
to seek elegance rather than luxury;
and refinement rather than fashion;
to be worthy, not respectable;
and wealthy, not rich;
to study hard, think quietly,
talk gently, act frankly;
to listen to stars and birds, to babes and sages,
with open heart;
to bear all cheerfully, do all bravely,
await occasion, hurry never;
in a word, to let the spiritual, unbidden and unconscious,
grow up through the common.
This is to be my symphony.
William Henry Channing
Don't ask yourself what the world needs;
ask yourself what makes you come alive.
And then go and do that.
Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.
Harold Whitman
Normal day, let me be aware of the treasure you are.
Let me learn from you, love you, bless you before you depart.
Let me not pass you by in quest of some rare and perfect tomorrow.
Let me hold you while I may, for it may not always be so.
One day I shall dig my nails into the earth, or bury my face in the pillow,
or stretch myself taut,
or raise my hands to the sky and want more than all the world, your return."
Mary Jean Iron
O, with what freshness, what solemnity and beauty, is each new day born;
as if to say to insensate man,
'Behold! thou hast one more chance! Strive for immortal glory!'
Harriet Beecher Stowe Author of "Uncle Tom's Cabin"
Life is an opportunity, benefit from it.
Life is beauty, admire it.
Life is bliss, taste it.
Life is a dream, realize it.
Life is a challenge, meet it.
Life is a duty, complete it.
Life is a game, play it.
Life is a promise, fulfill it.
Life is sorrow, overcome it.
Life is a song, sing it.
Life is a struggle, accept it.
Life is a tragedy, confront it.
Life is an adventure, dare it.
Life is luck, make it.
Life is too precious, do not destroy it.
Life is life, fight for it.
Mother Theresa Catholic Nun, Missionary Nobel Peace Prize Recipient
There are only two ways to live your life.
One is as though nothing is a miracle.
The other is as if everything is.
Albert Einstein
This is the beginning of a new day.
You have been given this day to use as you will.
You can waste it or use it for good.
What you do today is important because you are exchanging a day of your life for it. When tomorrow comes, this day will be gone forever;
in its place is something that you have left behind... let it be something good."
Author Unknown
Let me be a free man. Free to travel. Free to stop. Free to work.
Free to choose my own teachers. Free to follow the religion of my fathers.
Free to think and talk and act for myself.
Chief Joseph Nez Perce Indian Tribe
Twenty years from now
you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor.
Catch the trade winds in your sails.
Explore. Dream. Discover.
Mark Twain American Author
"Come to the edge."
"We can't. We're afraid."
"Come to the edge."
"We can't. We will fall!"
"Come to the edge"
And they came
And he pushed them
And they flew
Guillaume Apollinaire, 1880-1918 French Poet, Philosopher
Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark,
in the hopeless swamps of the approximate,
the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all.
Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach.
Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won.
It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours.
Ayn Rand Russian-born American Author
And the day came
when the risk it took to remain tight inside the bud
was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
Anais Nin American Author
When things go wrong as they sometimes will;
When the road you're trudging seems all uphill;
When the funds are low, and the debts are high
And you want to smile, but have to sigh;
When care is pressing you down a bit
Rest if you must, but do not quit.
Success is failure turned inside out;
The silver tint of the clouds of doubt;
And you can never tell how close you are
It may be near when it seems so far;
So stick to the fight when you're hardest hit
It's when things go wrong that you must not quit.
"Don't Quit,"
Author Unknown
Far better is it to dare mighty things,
to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure
...than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in a gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat.
Theodore Roosevelt 26th President Of The United States
Do not go where the path may lead,
go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.
Ralph Waldo Emerson American Poet
Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.
T. S. Eliot Poet
It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare,
it is because we do not dare that they are difficult.
Seneca Roman Philosoper, Statesman
Take the first step in faith.
You don't have to see the whole staircase,
just take the first step.
Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. American Civil Rights Leader
I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed,
you can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move.
Jesus of Nazareth The Bible Matthew 17:20
It is not the critic who counts;
not the man who points out how the strong man stumbled
or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.
The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena,
whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood;
who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again;
who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions;
who spends himself in a worthy cause;
who at the best, knows in the end the triumph of high achievement,
and who, at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while DARING GREATLY
so that his place shall never be with those timid souls
who know neither victory or defeat.
Theodore Roosevelt 26th President Of The United States
Pay no attention to what the critics say;
no statue has ever been erected to a critic.
Jean Sibelius Finnish Composer
Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goals.
Author Unknown
The men who try to do something and fail
are infinitely better than those who try to do nothing and succeed.
Lloyd Jones
Courage is not the absence of fear,
but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.
Ambrose Redmoon
Most of the important things in the world
have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying
when there seemed to be no hope at all.
Dale Carnegie American Author How To Win Friends And Influence People
What lies behind us and what lies before us
are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
Oliver Wendell Holmes American Author and Physician
The journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.
Lao Tzu Chinese Philosopher
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light not our darkness that frightens us.
We ask ourselves 'who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?'
Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It's not just in some of us; its in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine,
we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."
Marianne Williamson From her book Return To Love
(Commonly mistaken to be a quote by Nelson Mandella)
Husi: http://www.fountain-international.org/contributions/024.htm
Puisi hujan dan kamu
tik!tik!tik!
air hujan belum juga berhenti menjatuhi tubuhku dengan jarum-jarumnya
yang bening. basah. dingin.
dan bulir-bulirnya mengalir di seluruh sudut mukaku.
tiba-tiba aku jadi ingat kamu. yang tak pernah berhenti menghujaniku
dengan ciuman kecilmu. hangat. indah.
ciplak!ciplak!
sepasang kaki kecil berlari di depanku. tanpa disengaja air percikannya mengotori separuh gaunku.
gaun putihku.
sama putihnya dengan rasa rindu yang ada di hatiku saat ini.
aku jadi ingat kamu lagi. yang tak pernah puas memercikkan rindu-rindu
di dalam jiwaku. manis. megah.
hening.
kutelusuri hari-hari ini sendirian. menguak kerumunan tawa di depan mata. membelah kumpulan bahagia sekelompok anak-anak kecil yang berlarian
di tengah hujan. seakan tak ingat pesan ibunda yang melarang dirinya bermain
di bawah siraman air hujan. yang ada cuma tawa riang penuh kemenangan. ada luka di kaki dan tangan. tapi mereka tak acuh, tak pedulikan apa-apa.
ah, aku jadi ingat bekas lukamu di kaki dan tangan. yang bisa membawa cerita untuk dikenang. nanti. suatu saat nanti.
ada tempat berteduh di ujung sana.
setengah berlari aku mendekat.
duduk beralaskan plastik setengah kering. kuambil kertas dan pena
dari saku yang mulai terasa basah.
ah, lagi-lagi aku ingat kamu. dan ingin menulis tentang kamu.
semuanya tentang kamu.
..........karena memang cuma kamu yang ada dalam otakku.
Diambil dari: http://www.geocities.com/CollegePark/Quad/2371/puisihujan1.html
\m/ \m/
Award Husi Amigo ;-)
Hari ini tepatnya tanggal 31 Juli 2009 pukul 13:00, aku mendapat Award perdana dari blog Avanca Linux. Melalui proses penawaran dan restu dari Avanca Linux , akhirnya aku bisa mengambil Award tersebut. Terima kasih untuk Avanca Linux yang telah memberikan award ini kepada saya. Dan berhubung award ini adalah award berbacklink yang bisa membantu meningkatkan statistik blog sobat blogger sekalian, jadi saya juga ingin berbagi award ini kepada semua blogger yg telah setia dan tidak pernah bosan memberi semangat kepada . Kupersembahkan award ini kepada :
Inspirador, Impetil-BDG, QuintalBoot
“Bagi siapa saja yang menerima award ini diharuskan untuk membagikan kembali award ini kepada sepuluh orang temannya. Dan selanjutnya si penerima award harus meletakkan link-link berikut ini di blog atau artikel kamu :
Aturannya begini :
sebelum kamu meletakkan link di atas, kamu harus menghapus peserta nomor 1 dari daftar. Sehingga semua peserta naik 1 level. Yang tadi nomor 2 jadi nomor 1, nomor 3 jadi 2, dst. Kemudian masukkan link kamu sendiri di bagian paling bawah (nomor 10). Tapi ingat ya, kalian semua harus fair dalam menjalankannya. Jika tiap penerima award mampu memberikan award ini kepada 5 orang saja dan mereka semua mengerjakannya , maka jumlah backlink yang akan didapat adalah
Ketika posisi kamu 10, jumlah backlink = 1
Posisi 9, jml backlink = 5
Posisi 8, jml backlink = 25
Posisi 7, jml backlink = 125
Posisi 6, jml backlink = 625
Posisi 5, jml backlink = 3,125
Posisi 4, jml backlink = 15,625
Posisi 3, jml backlink = 78,125
Posisi 2, jml backlink = 390,625
Posisi 1, jml backlink = 1,953,125
Dan semuanya menggunakan kata kunci yang kamu inginkan. Dari sisi SEO kamu sudah mendapatkan 1,953,125 backlink dan efek sampingnya jika pengunjung web para downline kamu mengklik link itu, kamu juga mendapatkan traffik tambahan.
Nah, silahkan copy paste saja, dan hilangkan peserta nomor 1 lalu tambahkan link blog/website kamu di posisi 10. Ingat, kamu harus mulai dari posisi 10 agar hasilnya maksimal. Karena jika kamu tiba2 di posisi 1, maka link kamu akan hilang begitu ada yang masuk ke posisi 10.”
Selamat mengambil award-nya, sobat. Tetap jalin silaturrohim kepada para blogger agar blog sobat cepat naik trafik pengunjungnya. Selamat kepada para blogger yg mendapat award.
Obrigado ba Ebix84 for the award.
Marci ;-)
Aku Ingin Mencintaimu Dengan Sederhana
Penulis : Inayati
Aku memandang kalender yang terletak di meja dengan kesal. Sabtu, 30 Maret 2002, hari ulang tahun perkawinan kami yang ketiga. Dan untuk ketiga kalinya pula Aa’ lupa. Ulang tahun pertama, Aa’ lupa karena harus rapat dengan direksi untuk menyelesaikan beberapa masalah keuangan perusahaan. Sebagai Direktur keuangan, Aa’ memang berkewajiban menyelesaikan masalah tersebut. Baiklah, aku maklum. Persoalan saat itu memang lumayan pelik.
Ulang tahun kedua, Aa’ harus keluar kota untuk melakukan presentasi. Kesibukannya membuatnya lupa. Dan setelah minta maaf, waktu aku menyatakan kekesalanku, dengan kalem ia menyahut,” Dik, toh aku sudah membuktikan cintaku sepanjang tahun. Hari itu tidak dirayakan kan tidak apa-apa. Cinta kan tidak butuh upacara…”
Sekarang, pagi-pagi ia sudah pamit ke kantor karena harus menyiapkan beberapa dokumen rapat. Ia pamit saat aku berada di kamar mandi. Aku memang sengaja tidak mengingatkannya tentang ulang tahun perkawinan kami. Aku ingin mengujinya, apakah ia ingat atau tidak kali ini. Nyatanya? Aku menarik napas panjang.
Heran, apa sih susahnya mengingat hari ulang tahun perkawinan sendiri? Aku mendengus kesal. Aa’ memang berbeda dengan aku. Ia kalem dan tidak ekspresif, apalagi romantis. Maka, tidak pernah ada bunga pada momen-momen istimewa atau puisi yang dituliskan di selembar kertas merah muda seperti yang sering kubayangkan saat sebelum aku menikah.
Sedangkan aku, ekspresif dan romantis. Aku selalu memberinya hadiah dengan kata-kata manis setiap hari ulang tahunnya. Aku juga tidak lupa mengucapkan berpuluh kali kata I love you setiap minggu. Mengirim pesan, bahkan puisi lewat sms saat ia keluar kota. Pokoknya, bagiku cinta harus diekspresikan dengan jelas. Karena kejelasan juga bagian dari cinta.
Aku tahu, kalau aku mencintai Aa’, aku harus menerimanya apa adanya. Tetapi, masak sih orang tidak mau berubah dan belajar? Bukankah aku sudah mengajarinya untuk bersikap lebih romantis? Ah, pokoknya aku kesal titik. Dan semua menjadi tidak menyenangkan bagiku. Aku uring-uringan. Aa’ jadi benar-benar menyebalkan di mataku. Aku mulai menghitung-hitung waktu dan perhatian yang diberikannya kepadaku dalam tiga tahun perkawinan kami. Tidak ada akhir minggu yang santai. Jarang sekali kami sempat pergi berdua untuk makan malam di luar. Waktu luang biasanya dihabiskannya untuk tidur sepanjang hari. Jadilah aku manyun sendiri hampir setiap hari minggu dan cuma bisa memandangnya mendengkur dengan manis di tempat tidur.
Rasa kesalku semakin menjadi. Apalagi, hubungan kami seminggu ini memang sedang tidak baik. Kami berdua sama-sama letih. Pekerjaan yang bertumpuk di tempat tugas kami masing-masing membuat kami bertemu di rumah dalam keadaan sama-sama letih dan mudah tersinggung satu sama lain. Jadilah, beberapa kali kami bertengkar minggu ini.
Sebenarnya, hari ini aku sudah mengosongkan semua jadual kegiatanku. Aku ingin berdua saja dengannya hari ini dan melakukan berbagai hal menyenangkan. Mestinya, Sabtu ini ia libur. Tetapi, begitulah Aa’. Sulit sekali baginya meninggalkan pekerjaannya, bahkan pada akhir pekan seperti ini. Mungkin, karena kami belum mempunyai anak. Sehingga ia tidak merasa perlu untuk meluangkan waktu pada akhir pekan seperti ini.
”Hen, kamu yakin mau menerima lamaran A’ Ridwan?” Diah sahabatku menatapku heran. ”Kakakku itu enggak romantis, lho. Tidak seperti suami romantis yang sering kau bayangkan. Dia itu tipe laki-laki serius yang hobinya bekerja keras. Baik sih, soleh, setia… Tapi enggak humoris. Pokoknya, hidup sama dia itu datar. Rutin dan membosankan. Isinya cuma kerja, kerja dan kerja…” Diah menyambung panjang lebar. Aku cuma senyum-senyum saja saat itu. Aa’ memang menanyakan kesediaanku untuk menerima lamaranku lewat Diah.
”Kamu kok gitu, sih? Enggak senang ya kalau aku jadi kakak iparmu?” tanyaku sambil cemberut. Diah tertawa melihatku. ”Yah, yang seperti ini mah tidak akan dilayani. Paling ditinggal pergi sama A’ Ridwan.” Diah tertawa geli. ”Kamu belum tahu kakakku, sih!” Tetapi, apapun kata Diah, aku telah bertekad untuk menerima lamaran Aa’. Aku yakin kami bisa saling menyesuaikan diri. Toh ia laki-laki yang baik. Itu sudah lebih dari cukup buatku.
Minggu-minggu pertama setelah perkawinan kami tidak banyak masalah berarti. Seperti layaknya pengantin baru, Aa’ berusaha romantis. Dan aku senang. Tetapi, semua berakhir saat masa cutinya berakhir. Ia segera berkutat dengan segala kesibukannya, tujuh hari dalam seminggu. Hampir tidak ada waktu yang tersisa untukku. Ceritaku yang antusias sering hanya ditanggapinya dengan ehm, oh, begitu ya… Itupun sambil terkantuk-kantuk memeluk guling. Dan, aku yang telah berjam-jam menunggunya untuk bercerita lantas kehilangan selera untuk melanjutkan cerita.
Begitulah… aku berusaha mengerti dan menerimanya. Tetapi pagi ini, kekesalanku kepadanya benar-benar mencapai puncaknya. Aku izin ke rumah ibu. Kukirim sms singkat kepadanya. Kutunggu. Satu jam kemudian baru kuterima jawabannya. Maaf, aku sedang rapat. Hati-hati. Salam untuk Ibu. Tuh, kan. Lihat. Bahkan ia membutuhkan waktu satu jam untuk membalas smsku. Rapat, presentasi, laporan keuangan, itulah saingan yang merebut perhatian suamiku.
Aku langsung masuk ke bekas kamarku yang sekarang ditempati Riri adikku. Kuhempaskan tubuhku dengan kesal. Aku baru saja akan memejamkan mataku saat samar-samar kudengar Ibu mengetuk pintu. Aku bangkit dengan malas.
”Kenapa Hen? Ada masalah dengan Ridwan?” Ibu membuka percakapan tanpa basa-basi. Aku mengangguk. Ibu memang tidak pernah bisa dibohongi. Ia selalu berhasil menebak dengan jitu.
Walau awalnya tersendat, akhirnya aku bercerita juga kepada Ibu. Mataku berkaca-kaca. Aku menumpahkan kekesalanku kepada Ibu. Ibu tersenyum mendengar ceritaku. Ia mengusap rambutku. ”Hen, mungkin semua ini salah Ibu dan Bapak yang terlalu memanjakan kamu. Sehingga kamu menjadi terganggu dengan sikap suamimu. Cobalah, Hen pikirkan baik-baik. Apa kekurangan Ridwan? Ia suami yang baik. Setia, jujur dan pekerja keras. Ridwan itu tidak pernah kasar sama kamu, rajin ibadah. Ia juga baik dan hormat kepada Ibu dan Bapak. Tidak semua suami seperti dia, Hen. Banyak orang yang dizholimi suaminya. Na’udzubillah!” Kata Ibu.
Aku terdiam. Yah, betul sih apa yang dikatakan Ibu. ”Tapi Bu, dia itu keterlaluan sekali. Masak Ulang tahun perkawinan sendiri tiga kali lupa. Lagi pula, dia itu sama sekali tidak punya waktu buat aku. Aku kan istrinya, bu. Bukan cuma bagian dari perabot rumah tangga yang hanya perlu ditengok sekali-sekali.” Aku masih kesal. Walaupun dalam hati aku membenarkan apa yang diucapkan Ibu.
Ya, selain sifat kurang romantisnya, sebenarnya apa kekurangan Aa’? Hampir tidak ada. Sebenarnya, ia berusaha sekuat tenaga untuk membahagiakanku dengan caranya sendiri. Ia selalu mendorongku untuk menambah ilmu dan memperluas wawasanku. Ia juga selalu menyemangatiku untuk lebih rajin beribadah dan selalu berbaik sangka kepada orang lain. Soal kesetiaan? Tidak diragukan. Diah satu kantor dengannya. Dan ia selalu bercerita denganku bagaimana Aa’ bersikap terhadap rekan-rekan wanitanya di kantor. Aa’ tidak pernah meladeni ajakan Anita yang tidak juga bosan menggoda dan mengajaknya kencan. Padahal kalau mau, dengan penampilannya yang selalu rapi dan cool seperti itu, tidak sulit buatnya menarik perhatian lawan jenis.
”Hen, kalau kamu merasa uring-uringan seperti itu, sebenarnya bukan Ridwan yang bermasalah. Persoalannya hanya satu, kamu kehilangan rasa syukur…” Ibu berkata tenang.
Aku memandang Ibu. Perkataan Ibu benar-benar menohokku. Ya, Ibu benar. Aku kehilangan rasa syukur. Bukankah baru dua minggu yang lalu aku membujuk Ranti, salah seorang sahabatku yang stres karena suaminya berselingkuh dengan wanita lain dan sangat kasar kepadanya? Bukankah aku yang mengajaknya ke dokter untuk mengobati memar yang ada di beberapa bagian tubuhnya karena dipukuli suaminya?
Pelan-pelan, rasa bersalah timbul dalam hatiku. Kalau memang aku ingin menghabiskan waktu dengannya hari ini, mengapa aku tidak mengatakannya jauh-jauh hari agar ia dapat mengatur jadualnya? Bukankah aku bisa mengingatkannya dengan manis bahwa aku ingin pergi dengannya berdua saja hari ini. Mengapa aku tidak mencoba mengatakan kepadanya, bahwa aku ingin ia bersikap lebih romantis? Bahwa aku merasa tersisih karena kesibukannya? Bahwa aku sebenarnya takut tidak lagi dicintai?
Aku segera pamit kepada Ibu. Aku bergegas pulang untuk membereskan rumah dan menyiapkan makan malam yang romantis di rumah. Aku tidak memberitahunya. Aku ingin membuat kejutan untuknya.
Makan malam sudah siap. Aku menyiapkan masakan kegemaran Aa’ lengkap dengan rangkaian mawar merah di meja makan. Jam tujuh malam, Aa’ belum pulang. Aku menunggu dengan sabar. Jam sembilan malam, aku hanya menerima smsnya. Maaf aku terlambat pulang. Tugasku belum selesai. Makanan di meja sudah dingin. Mataku sudah berat, tetapi aku tetap menunggunya di ruang tamu.
Aku terbangun dengan kaget. Ya Allah, aku tertidur. Kulirik jam dinding, jam 11 malam. Aku bangkit. Seikat mawar merah tergeletak di meja. Di sebelahnya, tergeletak kartu ucapan dan kotak perhiasan mungil. Aa’ tertidur pulas di karpet. Ia belum membuka dasi dan kaos kakinya.
Kuambil kartu ucapan itu dan kubuka. Sebait puisi membuatku tersenyum.
Aku ingin mencintaimu dengan sederhana
Lewat kata yang tak sempat disampaikan
Awan kepada air yang menjadikannya tiada
Aku ingin mencintaimu dengan sederhana
Dengan kata yang tak sempat diucapkan
Kayu kepada api yang menjadikannya abu. *
For vieny, welcome to your husband’s heart.
*dikutip dari Aku ingin mencintaimu dengan sederhana karya Sapardi Djoko Damono.
Sumber : Majalah Ummi, edisi 12/XIII/2002
